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Help! I'm having a mid (20's) life crisis!

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Hello everyone,

I’m writing this post because I feel a bit lost at the moment, I’ve sort of come to a bit of a crossroads in my life and I’m not sure how to feel about it. I’m writing in the hope that I might see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel before I get to the end of the post, or in the hope that there might be someone else out there feeling the same way as me! I’m kind of going to use some of my Instagram feed for some inspiration and to remind myself of the good times I’ve had in the last 12 months! So here goes, I’m just going to write from the heart and see what happens…

This week I’ve been feeling very low, quite upset, and I’ve been bursting into tears almost every day. I got upset yesterday at work and just broke down completely in front of my manager.  I think the reason I’m upset is because I simply don’t know what to do with my life. I’ve never had this feeling before, I’ve always been quite content and grateful for a good job, nice car, fantastic family and friends and a good social life. However over the past few months I’ve realized that we are coming to the end of another year and I’m reflecting on what I’ve done/achieved in my life.  I’ve just found myself thinking that I’m not truly happy, and I think that stems from my desire and ambition to do something new.

I’m just itching to get away and explore the world, make incredible memories and meet new people, but I have no idea where to start. I’m torn between staying at home and just looking for a move to a new job in the travel industry, moving abroad to work, or just upping sticks and leaving to travel as much as I can. I’d much rather leave my life as I know it now to do something completely different, then come back  and try to kick start my career, but what if it goes wrong? What if I run out of money? What if I can’t handle not having a routine as I have done my whole life? There’s so many ifs and buts, yet I don’t know a single person who hasn’t enjoyed their experience of travelling.

I think I just need to stand tall, hold my head up high and take the plunge. If I don’t do it now, I never will. I’m in the perfect position, I don’t have kids, a boyfriend, no real financial commitments, and I have some substantial savings behind me – so why not just do it?! I’m dying to walk on beautiful beaches with the sea breeze in my hair, or to explore intimate cities and embrace their vibrant history and culture. I think I’m leaning more towards just travelling! Help! HOW DO I MAKE THIS DREAM A REALITY?!

 

I’d adore waking up to stunning sea views like the above, but I’d be equally happy with wandering the streets of ancient cities and releasing my inner explorer! Do I go long-haul on a once in a lifetime trip to the US or Australia, or do I have fun interailing round Europe’s  cities seeing their most famous landmarks? HELP!

On the other end of the scale, I’ve also thought about what skills I possess and whether I could make a living by working abroad rather than just travelling for a few months. I aced my GCSEs and A Levels and taught English to kids at school, I’ve been in employment since I was 16 and have good working/ customer service/computer skills that I’ve built on over time. I’m also getting more and more experience with my writing and I’m now freelancing and getting PAID for articles that I write. I suppose that in itself is an absolute dream come true! Who would have thought I could get paid to do the thing I adore?!

I still want more though, it’s not enough to just write a couple of articles a week – I need to earn a living from it in order to be successful, quit my day job and travel full time. I feel there are so many options I’m just not sure how to go about it!

Most of my friends have partners and are at different stages in their lives, and I can’t travel on my own as I have ongoing health issues which require me to go to the doctors and the hospital every couple of months. That in itself is a major issue – HOW LONG AM I SUPPOSED TO TRAVEL FOR?! I get check ups at the docs/hosp every three months – it’s so annoying! I’m sort of tied with that for the rest of my life which sucks.. and I get seriously lonely at the best of times so to go on my own just isn’t really an option at the moment.

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At my lowest point, when I was taken to hospital.

Ahhh I’m just going round and round in circles, I think I just need to really take my time and make the best possible decision for me, and only me. Have you ever got to your mid 20’s (OK, I know I’m only 22) and wondered what the hell it is you want to do with your life? Please share any comments/advice/wanderlust/inspo in the box below and I would LOVE to hear your thoughts!

Yours,

A very unsettled Jess x