Help! I'm having a mid (20's) life crisis!

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Hello everyone,

I’m writing this post because I feel a bit lost at the moment, I’ve sort of come to a bit of a crossroads in my life and I’m not sure how to feel about it. I’m writing in the hope that I might see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel before I get to the end of the post, or in the hope that there might be someone else out there feeling the same way as me! I’m kind of going to use some of my Instagram feed for some inspiration and to remind myself of the good times I’ve had in the last 12 months! So here goes, I’m just going to write from the heart and see what happens…

This week I’ve been feeling very low, quite upset, and I’ve been bursting into tears almost every day. I got upset yesterday at work and just broke down completely in front of my manager. ย I think the reason I’m upset is because I simplyย don’t know what to do with my life.ย I’ve never had this feeling before, I’ve always been quite content and grateful for a good job, nice car, fantastic family and friends and a good social life. However over the past few months I’ve realized that we are coming to the end of another year and I’m reflecting on what I’ve done/achieved in my life. ย I’ve just found myself thinkingย that I’m not truly happy, and I think that stems from my desire and ambition toย do something new.

I’m just itching to get away and explore the world, make incredible memories and meet new people, but I haveย no idea where to start.ย I’m torn between staying at home and just looking for aย move to a new jobย in the travel industry, moving abroad to work, or just upping sticks and leaving to travel as much as I can. I’d much rather leave my life as I know it now to do something completely different, then come back ย and try toย kick start my career, but what if it goes wrong? What if I run out of money? What if I can’t handle not having a routine as I have done my whole life? There’s so many ifs and buts, yet I don’t know a single person whoย hasn’tย enjoyed their experience of travelling.

I think I just need to stand tall, hold my head up high and take the plunge. If I don’t do it now,ย I never will.ย I’m in the perfect position, I don’t have kids, a boyfriend, no real financial commitments, and I have some substantial savings behind me – so why not just do it?! I’m dying to walk on beautiful beaches with the sea breeze in my hair, or to explore intimate cities and embrace their vibrant history and culture. I think I’m leaning more towards just travelling! Help! HOW DO I MAKE THIS DREAM A REALITY?!

 

I’d adore waking up to stunning sea views like the above, but I’d be equally happy with wandering the streets of ancientย cities and releasing my inner explorer! Do I go long-haul on a once in a lifetime trip to the US or Australia, or do I have fun interailing round Europe’s ย cities seeing their most famous landmarks? HELP!

On the other end of the scale, I’ve also thought about what skills I possess and whether I could make a living by working abroad rather than just travelling for a few months. I aced my GCSEs and A Levels and taught English to kids at school, I’ve been in employment since I was 16 and have good working/ customer service/computer skills that I’ve built on over time. I’m also getting more and more experience with my writing and I’m now freelancing and getting PAID for articles that I write. I suppose that in itself is an absoluteย dream come true!ย Who would have thought I could get paid to do the thing I adore?!

I still want more though, it’s not enough to just write a couple of articles a week – I need to earn a living from it in order to be successful, quit my day job and travel full time. I feel there are so many options I’m just not sure how to go about it!

Most of my friends have partners and are at different stages in their lives, and I can’t travel on my own as I have ongoing health issues which require me to go to the doctors and the hospital every couple of months. That in itself is a major issue – HOW LONG AM I SUPPOSED TO TRAVEL FOR?! I get check ups at the docs/hosp every three months – it’s so annoying!ย I’m sort of tied with that for the rest of my life which sucks.. and I get seriously lonely at the best of times so to go on my own just isn’t really an option at the moment.

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At my lowest point, when I was taken to hospital.

Ahhh I’m just going round and round in circles, I think I just need to reallyย take my timeย and make the best possible decision for me, and only me. Have you ever got to your mid 20’s (OK, I know I’m only 22) and wondered what the hell it is you want to do with your life? Please share any comments/advice/wanderlust/inspo in the box below and I would LOVE to hear your thoughts!

Yours,

A very unsettled Jess x

 

 

0 replies
  1. traveladdictuk
    traveladdictuk says:

    Jessica – Its ok to feel like this sometimes. What is stopping you going off for a couple of months and exploring the UK or places in Europe that you can get back home for your health checks ? And then you will see if you like it and want to travel further. I have constant health problems, and can not travel full time. Take care – happy holidays !

    Reply
    • JourneyswithJessica
      JourneyswithJessica says:

      Thank you so much for your feedback! Totally agree with that point, I am lucky enough to live in a great place in the UK with great links to London and other big cities and Europe is close enough to be able to do weekend breaks so I’ll definitely plan a few more of those! Thanks again for your advice, sorry to hear you have health problems too – it sucks! Happy travels and you take care too! Jess x

      Reply
  2. Amanda | Chasing My Sunshine
    Amanda | Chasing My Sunshine says:

    Sounds like a solid quarter life crisis you’ve got on your hands, my dear! I’ve been dealing with mine since 22 as well. ๐Ÿ˜‰ It sounds like you’re on the right track and that you’ve got a good head on your shoulders. So I’m sure whatever you decide will be good. Either in a sense that you’ll be happy doing what you choose…OR you know that you can cross it off of your list! That’s really helped me narrow down the 20395720976 options there are in life. I still feel lost and pulled to travel pretty frequently, but I don’t feel quite as crazed as I used to.

    Regardless, just remember that YOU ARE AMAZING and you will find a way to be happy. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • JourneyswithJessica
      JourneyswithJessica says:

      Thank you so much Amanda for your fantastic feedback, really appreciate it! It’s good to know that I’m not alone in feeling this way, I just need to be proactive and plan things for next year so I can look forward! Thank so much for your comments, happy travels to you! Jess ๐Ÿ™‚ x

      Reply
  3. Kat
    Kat says:

    Hi Jess,

    You are not alone – what you’re experiencing sounds like the well-documented quarter life crisis! I’ve been there, actually maybe I still am there, myself.

    I’ve been feeling very similarly to what you describe above for the last year or so. I was living at home at 25, doing a job that earned okay money and was fine but not exactly stretching me and with no prospects for career progression, not to mention that it wasn’t really what I wanted to be doing with my life. I’ve always loved travelling and I realised I was living for the time I could take off a couple of times a year and go abroad. In the end I thought the same as you, something needs to change and if I look for another job now I’m going to be there for potentially another 3 years by which time I’ll be 28 (yikes!) If I’m going to go travelling that was the time to do it, I knew it had to be before I got to the age when I was going to hopefully have some ties to home.

    So I applied for a working holiday visa to come spend a year in Australia. I’ve been here three months now and it’s honestly the best decision I ever made. Sure there are days when I miss my family and friends at home but I’ve never spent a moment regretting it and I definitely don’t regret quitting my dead-end job. I realise that you can’t go away solo for a year like I did and waiting around for someone to come with you might mean you wait around forever but why don’t you go somewhere for a few months?

    I’ve met a few people in Australia who’ve just taken a career break and come for about 3 months so they could be home for Christmas. Also no need to worry about getting lonely, if you stay in hostels there are loads of solo travellers and making friends is so easy you could end up spending as little time alone as you wanted.

    What gave me the push to finally do it was that I realised if I didn’t come I would regret it forever and even if it was the worst experience ever there was nothing to stop me from booking a plane ticket straight home again. I really do think it’s true that you only regret the chances you don’t take.

    Btw I still don’t know what I want to do with my life though (unless travelling forever is a legitimate option)!

    Reply
    • JourneyswithJessica
      JourneyswithJessica says:

      Hey Kat, wow thank you SO much for taking the time to write your feedback on my post- hugely appreciated!!! That’s amazing that you just plucked up the courage and headed over to Aus, such a brave decision! I hope I can follow in those footsteps and do something similar, but not for as long as a year due to my health issues. But thank you for giving me some serious inspo to get out and travel as much as I can! If only travelling forever was doable huh?! I’d adore to be on the road for months on end” Thanks again Kat, wishing you safe and happy travels! Jess x

      Reply
  4. Emma | Paper Planes and Caramel Waffles
    Emma | Paper Planes and Caramel Waffles says:

    Oh Jess, I honestly believe that EVERYONE will feel like this at some stage in their lives. I’ve been feeling a lot like it too lately and can totally empathise with bursting into tears in front of your manager – I did the exact same thing a couple of weeks ago. Totally not my finest moment!

    However, if you feel like you need a change and there’s honestly not that much tying you to the UK then go for it. Do something different and enjoy all the strange and wonderful experiences that come along with it. It’s more than likely you won’t regret it ๐Ÿ™‚

    If you can’t be away from home for more than 3 months then plan something amazing. You could travel the USA for 3 months, go to SE Asia or even inter rail around Europe. The things you could do with that amount of time are endless. But then it’s about what you do when you get back home.

    There could be another alternative though if you fancy a more permanent change. I know when Ii was in Australia, British citizens can use the medical system just like you would in the UK so a working holiday could possibly be an option?

    Whatever you do, make sure you’re happy and travel in hostels – you’ll never be lonely I swear. Plus things like Facetime and Skype make family and friends seem so close if you are feeling a bit down while travelling ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • JourneyswithJessica
      JourneyswithJessica says:

      Ahh Emma thanks so much for your lovely words- its so refreshing to hear that you felt the same too not that long ago- I guess it really does happen to everyone! I’m just hugely dissatisfied at the moment but I’m learning to realise that its only me who can change that and I’ve just got to go for it! Thanks for the tips re the medical situation in Aus, I’ll definitely have a think about that!! I guess the list is endless I’ve just got to plan and give myself some options, really appreciate your words of wisdom though lovely -thanks so much! Take care and chat soon! Jess ๐Ÿ™‚ x

      Reply
  5. adventuresthroughmylens
    adventuresthroughmylens says:

    Hey Jess. I don’t know how I came across your blog but I’m glad I did, this is the first post I’ve read. I am 28 and actually just went through what you are going through. The only difference with me is I have a boyfriend. I’m Canadian and I was your age when I actually came over to the UK to experience everything you just described. I was a recent graduate with my teaching degree and in Canada it is hard to find a teaching job. I hadn’t travelled much then so, flying to England alone, searching for a place to live and working as a teacher was a great adventure. I only stayed 5 months, went home, went back to retail and hoped I would get a teaching job. I met my boyfriend in spring the following year and now almost 4 years later we found ourselves feeling the exact same. We were in a position of do we move in together, in what city, etc. You aren’t alone in your feelings, it’s what you do with your courage that will set you apart. So many people have told me they wish they were doing what we were doing, to be able to leave home and travel. It’s something we don’t want to regret so as much as it scares us, leaving our jobs at home, our belongings and our family we know it’s the right decision. We have come to your country for our adventure because it’s a train ride or a short flight away from so much of the world we want to see. You have a great blog base, something I’ve tried to create. Be proud of what you have accomplished so far, it will help with your future. Don’t be upset with your doctor restrictions to be close to home, you are in a great position in Europe to do what so many people wish they were able to do, including me! Which is why England is amazing! All the best!

    Love,
    a Canadian living in England!

    Reply
    • JourneyswithJessica
      JourneyswithJessica says:

      Aw thank you so much for your lovely words they really made me smile!! I think I’ve realised that I’m not alone in this and there are so many options and opportunities available to me I’ve just got to decide what it is that I want and go and grab it! Really refreshing to hear that you have a boyfriend and felt the same though- not many people have said that to me! But it’s great that you both wanted to travel together, how lovely! I will keep you updated with what I do next, I’ve got a lot of thinking to do, and re the teaching side of things that would open a lot of doors for me I’ve just got to be sure that I do want it enough! I’m so pleased for you that you’ve found a new life here in England and I hope you are happy – I love this country just as much but I’ve just got to get out and explore the rest of the world! Thanks again so much again for your comments, take care! Love Jess ๐Ÿ™‚ x

      Reply

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. […] positive now, but it does have a happy ending- promise! Some of you might remember reading about my quarter-life crisis, where this time last year I had a mini breakdown. I was so unhappy with my life; I wasn’t […]

  2. […] tripping across America for a few months… HELP! Whatย do I do?! Your response to my recent Mid Life Crisis article was AMAZING! I was so overwhelmed with allย your lovely comments, some from people I […]

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